Food

      Taco pie, chili, meatloaf, breakfast muffins, pot roast, lime chicken, quiche, chocolate crescents, pulled pork, cheesy potatoes, pork tenderloin, and lasagna. Mouth watering yet? Family and friends have stepped in over the last month to cook for us and take a portion off of Michelle's plate every evening. These meals have allowed Chelle and I time to enjoy one another over dinner and to relax with one another after long days of teaching instead of her worring about cooking.

      These days I have had trouble feeding myself if the meal isn't a finger food or is messy. I bring simple meals to work and have had to pass on some tasty treats when I'm not around people I feel comfortable asking to feed me. Eating may be my favorite activity, especially when it's paired with beer drinking. We went out for Mexican the other night and Chelle was an excellent chips and salsa assistant. Even when there are people who may not understand why my wife is feeding me and stare throughout my meal, I continue to smile and laugh. Their glances don't change the taste of my Modelo.

      Yesterday we made the trek to Oak Park to have Thanksgiving Dinner at my mom's house. She always goes all out and cooks everything with detail and deliciousness. Her gravy is so good I put it on my Jello. Cornbread, turkey, Jello, stuffing, green bean casserole, carrots, rolls, apple and pumpkin pie, brownies, all washed down with good German beer. I've feasted like a king over the last month, and though I physically haven't been able to stuff my face myself, the wonderful conversations, laughter and  love I've experienced during that time is  the definition of Grace. 

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone 

Grace's Future

      Earlier this week my Grandma Grahnke passed away after being ill off and on again for the last few years. She lost her husband a few years back and her son, my dad in 2006. Grandma was always kind, I guess all grandmas are, she loved us grandkids so much and loved talking to us on the phone and in person. She always remembered what we spoke about the previous time and would follow up, your needs always came before hers.

      Now that she's passed and I reflect about all these conversations we had over the years I've realized I don't know as much about her as I should. Specifically I don't know what she believed in her heart about what comes after our time on earth. I probably think about what comes next more than others do having ALS, and I'm glad I know what comes next and that's heaven. I talk about finding the Grace in the day to day and I can do this thanks to my faith in God. "For it is by Grace you have been saved, through faith--and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God."-Ephesians 2:8. When I think about where Grandma is now I picture her with my grandpa and dad together in heaven once more, but like I mentioned, I wish I knew for sure that's where she believed she would end up.

      Unless a miracle cure happens soon I know for a fact that I will leave this earth sooner than I expected. That sucks but I've made peace with it. What I haven't made peace with is the idea that some of my closest friends and family may not join me when I'm finally rid of this bullshit disease. 

I'm not writing this blog to cast stones or judge anyone, but I am taking the time to be selfish. Selfish because I don't want you crying at a gravesite thinking of how much you miss me when I go. I want you to pause and think about the good times we have ahead, the good times God's Grace can allow us, the good times we'll share in heaven.