I spent the morning in a self-implosion mess. I have these mornings every now and then, I mainly attribute them to the expiration feeling that haunts those with ALS and the fact that I know I drift from God. There are times and places where I feel intertwined with God. My kitchen where I make calls to healthcare service offices, send and respond to dozens of emails and messages, advocate and fundraise for numerous ALS organizations is not one of those places. I let stress and caffeine take over and spiral away from my happy place to feeling more like a superficial cog in a pointless wheel. Yet, only a few days ago I was in that place where I was intertwined with God. I saw a magnificent reminder that our lives aren't random, that our dreams for this world fall way short to God's plan. I was immersed in nature in Door County.
Naturalist E. O. Wilson said, "nature holds the key to our aesthetic, intellectual, cognitive and even spiritual satisfaction." Yes Door County is inhabited by many kitchy shops, restaurants and wineries for tourists to flock, but it also has one of the more diverse and fragile ecosystems in the country. God's presence is felt when you see the Sugar Maples, American Beech, Yellow Birch, Eastern Hemlock, Ironwood and Red Oak trees that litter the peninsula. There are thousands of wildflower species growing in every direction, sometimes right through rock. Dozens of violets, Trout Lily, Jack-in-the-pulpit, Dutchman Breeches just to name a few. There is 75 miles of coast on either side of the peninsula where the water is clear as glass ready to reflect the most beautiful colors you've ever seen. Creeks and wetlands with fish, toads, turtles, dragonflies, Blue Herons, Bald Eagles, fox and white tailed deer visit. Sunsets where you feel God's presence in the arrays of colors that plaster the sky like a masterpiece. Every season offers magnificent beauty and serenity. Proof in every sight that we are not in control and that not having control shouldn't be scary but should bring satisfaction. It's also proof that God prefers diversity in his aesthetics, that differences should be celebrated.
On mornings like this one when "control" feels like it's slipping through my fingers like sand I need to hit pause and reflect on the aesthetics of this world. Glimpses of the beauty and serenity I will one day be immersed in forever. No stress, no pain, only intertwined peace, love and magnificence. Grace all around.