Monday, October 12, 2015

Wakefulness Slumber

      I was cruising the streets of Oak Park in my '92 Oldsmobile Achieva on a bright blue fall day. Every tree was a different shade of orange, yellow and red, mixing well and smelling of soil. Cate and Rosie took over stereo duties and cranked some David Banner. The bass rattled as we cruised East Ave on our way to DiNico's Pizza. I was feeling 17 again, and then I felt a fire burning in my left foot, then it shot to my knee, my hip, DiNico's left my mind, Cate and Rosie vanished and I awoke with a silent, "son of a bitch," in my head. 
      This is an every night experience. I take solis in my dreams where I get to run, drive, climb, and dance, things I no longer get to do because of ALS. I escape this bullshit and enjoy the world in ways most people take for granted. These dreams however get cut short all too often with a leg cramp or growing pain. Imagine getting a Charlie horse but not being able to move to release the pain. I try with all my might to adjust my legs on my own without waking Chelle. She does so much for me during the day I want her to be able to sleep peacefully. I spend many hours awake, in pain, trying to think happy thoughts to make the pain subside. Shenanigans with friends, French fries, beer, boobs, running, Christmas, all go-to happy thoughts, and then I pray. I pray that one day this disease will leave me, and then my angel Chelle swoops in and rescues me, pulling me onto my side to eliminate the pain, once again embracing the Grace around me.

2 comments:

  1.  I am overwhelm with joy and happiness and i am happy to share this with you all around the world about how Dr.CHUKWU MADU HERBAL HOME cured HERPES VIRUS...ever since i was diagnosed of Herpes virus in 2015, I was always thinking on how  I can get a solution out of my body so that i can be okay again. Until One day I went online on the internet to know more about the Herpes Virus i came across a Review Comment many people are saying that Dr.CHUKWU MADU HERBAL HOME cured their Herpes Genital Virus, I did not believe, i search again and i saw a testimony of someone who has been healed from HPV AND HIV by Dr.CHUKWU MADU HERBAL HOME..and i decided to contact Dr CHUKWU MADU HERBAL HOME to Help and i told him about my HERPES illness he told me not to worry about,that he is going to send me his herbal medicine and actually he did.i took the medicine just as prescribe by him, he told me to go for check up in the hospital which i did and to my great surprise my Doctor told me the Herpes Virus was no longer there, all thank to you sir Dr CHUKWU MADU HERBAL HOME, contact his WhatsApp Number: +2347030936239 .His email: dr.chukwumaduherbalhome@gmail.com. His herbs are very powerful and has no side effects. He can cured all kinds of Viruses, diseases, sicknesses.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I was diagnosed as HEPATITIS B carrier in 2013 with fibrosis of the
    liver already present. I started on antiviral medications which
    reduced the viral load initially. After a couple of years the virus
    became resistant. I started on HEPATITIS B Herbal treatment from
    ULTIMATE LIFE CLINIC (www.ultimatelifeclinic.com) in March, 2020. Their
    treatment totally reversed the virus. I did another blood test after
    the 6 months long treatment and tested negative to the virus. Amazing
    treatment! This treatment is a breakthrough for all HBV carriers.

    ReplyDelete